Use Your Head
by PadaleckiGrease
Summary: A year and a half after the movie was set. A lot's changed. Warning: This will contain spanking of minor from a parental figure, if you don't like, Do not Read!
1. Chapter 1

I stepped out of the school building on a cloudy Friday afternoon, reading a note from my Science teacher that Darry was gonna have to sign. I knew I'd probably get hollered at for the rest of the night until I locked myself in my bedroom and cried to Sodapop. The stupid note was about how I wasn't paying attention in class when he was talking about cells and shit. It ain't my fault. I sit next to a window and the sky looked pretty. So I thought about the sky, and then I thought about Johnny. And then I thought about Dally.

It's been a year and a half since Johnny Cade and Dallas Winston died. They were both too young and had too many people that loved them to die. Johnny went out like a hero. Dally went out like a hood.

Not a day goes by that I don't think about those two, and it's the same with everyone else in the gang. We all think about them, but we never talk about them. Nobody's spoken a word of Dally or Johnny since their funeral.

Part of me wanted to walk by the cemetery and visit those two. They were buried side by side. I wanted to talk to them about everything that had been going on since they died. Which is nothing new. Not since the last time I'd talked to them last week.

I decided against it, though, since I'm already late because of detention and Darry's already gonna lose his head with me.

Things have been better with me and Darry since I got back from the church after Johnny killed that Soc, but Darry is still the closest thing to a parental figure I got left in this world, so he has to be a jerk at times.

The last time I actually got into trouble is when I decided it'd be a good idea to smoke grass. Soda found out. Soda told Darry. Darry took a strap to my backside. Never again. After it happened, I didn't talk to either of my brothers for a solid week until I had a dream that they left me and woke up screaming my head off at 3 in the morning. I spent the rest of that night crying in Darry's lap like a 4 year old.

That was the first time I'd ever been spanked, and at that moment I planned for it to be the last. But for some reason when I walked into my front door today and seen Darry's pissed off face, I realized those plans might just be ruined.

"Where in the hell have you been?! You were 'spose to of been home 3 hours ago, Pony!" he shouted at me, throwing the towel he was drying his hands off with down on the living room coffee table. He must've been doing dishes.

"I had detention." I said, looking down at the ground.

"For what?" he questioned.

"Not paying attention in class." I muttered, shoving my cold hands in the pockets of my hoodie.

He glared at me for a second before shaking his head. "Pony, did you walk home by yourself?"

I stayed quiet for a while. I'd figure he already knows the answer to that. I mean, Darry's a real smart guy. That's what made Darry lose his head and get mad at me. He'd became a bit more protective since the incident since a lot of Soc's would do anything to get ahold of me for killing their friend.

"Ponyboy, you've got to use your head!" he hollered at me as I sat on the couch, staring at the chocolate stained carpet.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get it. Why don't you just call me stupid and we could end the dumbass argument a lot quicker?"

"Watch that lip, boy." he warned. "And I don't call your stupid because you're not stupid, you just do dumb things that are eventually going to get you hurt."

"But I'm fine! I carry a blade on me." I told him, hoping he'd lighten up on me just a little bit, with no such luck.

"Pony, I'm not going to have this argument with you today." he groaned.

"Why not? Because your losing it?" My smart mouth is going to be the death of me one day.

"Last warning on the lip. You're grounded for a week. And I swear if you don't start using your head and quit walking alone I'll whip you like I did before. Do you understand me?" he cocked an eyebrow and glared at me again.

I didn't want to give in that easy, but my brother is intimidating, and I know he ain't lyin' about whipping me again, so I mumbled a "Yes." and stomped off to my room. I layed flat on the bed and groaned. I was supposed to go to the drive-in with Kathy tonight. Kathy really liked me a lot, and I liked her a lot too. She was the only one I could talk to about the things I used to talk to Johnny about. Kathy and me ain't together, but she's like my bestfriend. She's pretty and all, I just don't want no girlfriend right now. I really want to go to this movie with her though, and I plan on it. It's Friday night. Soda'll be with Steve, probably with some girls. Darry's got some work to do tonight. I'll be home alone, so Darry shouldn't find out as long as I get home before he does, which is usually between 8 and 9, so as long as I'm back by about 7:30, I should be fine.

*That Night

I was able to sneak out no trouble. Darry was already gone to work and as I had expected, Steve and Soda were over at the Shepard's house. Darry isn't a big fan of either me or Sodapop being over there, but what Darry doesn't know won't hurt him. Or us.

I met Kathy at the Drive-In at 5, and I left at 7, so I had time to get home using alleyways and backstreets, to avoid accidentally running to Darry while we were both on our ways home. I didn't even think about Soc's until I seen a mustang full of 6 of them come to a quick stop right next to me.

My big brother's are right. I never use my head.


	2. Chapter 2

I didn't even have time to make a run for it before I was being tackled to the ground by 2 of the oversized sweater vest wearing buffoons.

"Hey, grease. Whatcha doing out this late?" the one with the blonde hair said, punching me square in my nose. "Soda! Darry! Steve!" I screamed over and over again, but it didn't matter. I was too far away from home, and besides, I don't think anyone was there anyways. So, I had to lay there and get beat by 6 idiots who want me dead. After being kicked in the ribs and hearing a loud crack, I passed out from the pain.

The next thing I remember was being shaken awake by someone yelling my name in my face. Once I finally had the willpower to open my eyes, I seen that the sun was beginning to rise, but it was barely over the horizon.

"God Damnit, Pony, I thought you were dead!" I turned my head with a slight whimper from the pain that came from the movement and looked up to see Darry with worried eyes hovering over me.

"I-I'm sorry." I croaked out, but he shushed me.

"Quiet. Dammit, Pone. You're real hurt. Those Soc's got you good." He said, examining my face. I just then realized I was still laying on the gravel alley that I got jumped in. That was around 7, so since the sun is rising I must've been out here for hours before he found me. He and Sodapop musta been so worried.

He went to pick me up bridal style, but I let out an unintentional yell from the pain. "My ribs, Dar."

He set me back down carefully before lifting up my shirt. I didn't look, but I could tell by the way his facial expression changed they my torso must not of looked too pretty.

"You're just gonna have to endure the pain because I have to get you to my truck and get you home, little buddy." he ran his fingers through my hair . I sighed and nodded squeezing my eyes shut as he picked me up. It hurt like a bitch, but I pushed through it until he gently put me in the front seat of his truck. He sped to the house, where Steve, Two-Bit, Dally, and Sodapop were all sitting on the front porch, and even Steve looked worried when Darry picked me up out of the front seat of his pickup.

"What the hell happened?!" Two-Bit questioned, quickly holding open the door for his two friends.

"Soc's got ahold of 'em. Get the first-aid kit, Soda." Darry ordered as he gently plopped me down on the couch, getting a yelp out of me. Darry's version of 'gentle' is pretty rough. It's nice to know he tried though.

"What's wong wit Pone?" I heard Dally question, pulling on Steve's sleeve.

"Long story, baby." he said, picking him up so he was sitting on his hip.

I know you're confused right now. So let me explain. Dally is Steve's son. He got left on Steve's doorstep 2 weeks after Johnny and Dallas died, All he had was a note on his carseat that said "You're the father, I can't do this alone anymore. He's six months old." Not a name or nothing more. Steve's not even sure who the mother of his son is.

Steve denied him until they got a test done with proof. In my eyes, though, there was no need for proof, Dally was Steve's twin. Sodapop came up with the name Dally, after Dallas. He said it could of been Johnny, but he looked more like a Dally. Thus, Dally Cade Randle was born. He's 2 now, and an adorable pain in the ass.

I felt a stinging in my face that brought to tears to my eyes when Darry poured peroxide on a gash on my chin. I bit my lip to keep myself from crying in front of the rest of what was left of our gang, but it hurt so bad that I couldn't keep a couple of tears from rolling down my face. Not even Two-Bit had some wise crack about it.

"Is he going to need to go to the hospital?" Steve asked, completely ignoring how his two year old was tugging at his hair.

"I don't think so. His ribs aren't broken, just bruised. He's gotta broken nose and I'm pretty sure a concussion, but other than that he's just real bruised up. Gonna be in some pain for the next couple a days." Darry brushed my bangs out of my face as he answered.

"Glory, what were you doing out that late?" Soda asked. That was the one question I hoped everyone avoided.

"I just don't use my head, Dar's right. " I said gently shutting my eyes.

"You got that right." Steve murmured. "I'm gonna head home, get this one down for a nap. I'll see ya'll later. And feel better Pony, you look like you're dyin'." and with that, Dally and him was gone.

"Yah, I promised my mom I'd help her paint something, I don't know. I was drunk when I agreed, but I gotta go, I'll see y'all later. Feel better, Pone." Two-Bit said, slamming the door on the way out.

"Pony, you can't go to sleep. You've got a concussion, you know that." he shook me as my eyes began to droop.

"Are you gonna yell at me?" I asked droopily, because I knew it was bound to happen eventually. This time I actually deserved it and he was being calm.

"No, I'm not." he answered.

"You should! He could of gotten himself killed! It took us hours to find him. You gotta stop actin' so stupid, Ponyboy! You're a smart boy. Smarter than all of us but you do such stupid shit!" I wasn't expecting Soda to blow up at me like that. I don't think Darry was either.

"I'll deal with things later, okay, Soda? You were up all night. Go to bed." Darry said softly pointing back to me and Soda's bedroom. Soda took one last look at me, and with a huff he went to the room with a slam of the door.

"How'd you guys find me?" I ended up whining. I hate the fact that Soda and Darry's mad at me. Darry may not be actin' like it, but I know he's pissed off at me. He's just waiting 'til I feel better to yell at me.

"When I got home from work, you wasn't here. I thought you just snuck out, so me and your brother just waited up until you decided to come home. But when 3 o'clock came around and you still wasn't here, I went to look for you. It took 2 hours before I found you laying in a stupid alley." he explained.

I started to cry at what he said. Just because I felt so bad for scaring them something awful. It might of been the concussion messing with my emotions or something, though.

"Stop that, little brother. I'm gonna get you some medicine for the pain, okay?" he combed his fingers through my hair as he spoke softly. It's kind of hard to remember that Darry has a soft side when his exterior is so tough.

"Okay, Superman." I sniffled. Less than 2 minutes passed before he was back handing me a glass of whater and some two pills I was too dazed to recognize. Whatever it was, it made the pounding pain in my whole body go down like 6 notches.

"Can I go to sleep?" I asked hopefully. All I really wanted to do was rest my head in Darry's lap and sleep. Nothing more than that at the moment.

He sighed and looked at the clock. "No, baby. Give it an hour or two."

"No, I wanna go to sleep now!" I whined, and I'm pretty sure if I would of been standing up I would stomped my foot.

"Pony, no. You ain't goin' to sleep yet." He said sternly, flipping on the TV.

I pouted at him and when he sat down next to my feet, I kicked him in the hip. I'm pretty sure he barely felt it, but I definitely felt it when he smacked my thigh four times for doing it.

Bastard.


	3. Chapter 3

Eventually, but not soon enough, I was able to go to sleep, my headed rested in Darry's lap at around 10 in the morning, and we were both tired enough that we fell asleep on the couch, though I woke up 6 hours later in the bed I shared with Soda, alone. I'm sure he's still pissed off at me. I don't blame him. I just hope he get's over it soon.

Soda can go back to being my defender, and Darry can wallop me for this shit and everything be back to normal.  
Speaking of Darry, he's probably asleep in his room. Or up cooking. Knowin' him, it's probably the second one.

I went to go find out for myself. Must've forgot I had extremely bruised ribs. I sure remembered when that pain hit me when I tried to sit up, I ended up laying right back down.

"Dar?" I called weakly, not wanting to hurt myself by yelling too loud. I wasn't sure if he heard me, but eventually I heard footsteps coming towards my bedroom. Darry opened the door. He wasn't wearing a shirt, just rather tight blue jeans and he looked like he hadn't slept in a month.

"Yeah, Pony?" he asked, feeling my forehead.

"It hurts." I whimper out, my hand going to my ribs.

Darry sighed. "I'll get you some medicine, and something to eat."

He did just that, and helped me into the living room so I could eat and watch TV with Dally, who Darry was babysitting.

"I'm guessin' Steve and Soda are at work?" I ask as I watch the little brown haired boy run around the house, giggling about absolutely nothin'. I worry about that kid.

"Yeah." Darry said, before raising his voice a bit. "Dally, if I have to tell you to stop runnin' again I'm tellin' your Daddy the second he gets here!"  
That definitely got his attention as he quickly ran, accidentally breaking the rules, to sit down in front of me on the couch and watch TV. "Sowwy. No tell daddy." he said, sitting criss-cross applesauce as we watched some cartoon that was keeping his attention before.

"Then be good." Darry said sternly to the toddler as he sat a bowl of rice in front of me, along with two pills and a glass of water.

"Thanks." I muttered as I started eating.

"It should hold you over 'til I make dinner later." Darry said as he sat down beside me feet at the end of the couch.

"So, what are you gonna do when I get better? Like..punishment wise." I spoke quietly with my food.

"What do you think?" he said sarcastically.

"I gotta good feelin' that damn strap will be involved." I muttered as I took a small bite.

"See, I told you you're smart." Darry chuckled, a smirk on his handsome face.

"But don't you think I'm being punished enough! I can't even sit up without bein' in pain!" I exclaimed, causing Dally to turn around and shush me. Apparently I'm interruptin' his show.

"Let's say that's punishment for sneaking out after I grounded your ass." my big brother huffed. "I'll personally deal with you for walking alone again. "

"I think you just want an excuse to whip me again." I growled as I crossed my arms over my chest.

"What? You think I enjoyed that?" He asked me, apparently he was genuinely surprised. "Pony, I hated it just as much as you did. You think I liked seeing you in pain? Or liked the fact that you didn't talk to me for a week?"

"Then why'd you do it?" I asked quietly. I didn't get it. If it hurt him so damn bad then why was he doin' it?

"Because I liked doing that more than I'd like seeing you dead somewhere, Ponyboy."

I get it now.

And now I feel terrible.

"I'm sorry." was all I could muster up as I pushed my food away and slowly leaned back so I was laying down on the couch.

"Just stop worrying about it. I won't even be considering doing anything until you can at least walk by yourself again." Darry replied as Soda and Steve stepped into the house.

"Daddy!" Dally shouted as he quickly ran to Steve, his father picking him up under his armpits.

"Hey, buddy." he greeted, ruffling his son's hair. "He didn't give you any problems, did he?"

"Not really, no. He had a problem with listening, but he was pretty good." Darry said as he grabbed Soda's dirty shirt from him and threw it into the dirty clothes bin.

"Why weren't you listening to Uncle Darry?" Steve asked, furrowing his eyebrows at his two year old who was sitting on his hip.

Dally shrugged, muttering an apology as he stuck his head in Steve's neck, hiding his face from everyone else. "I told you he was fine, Steve. " Darry muttered.

"Whatever." Steve muttered. "Did he take a nap?"

"Nope." Darry replied.

"Why the hell not?!" Steve exclaimed. We all knew Dally was a brat if he didn't take at least a 2 hour nap.

"He didn't wanna take a nap. I didn't make him take a nap." Darry said. Usually, he didn't care if Dal wanted to take a nap. But I'm pretty sure today he was just seeing how annoyed he could make Steve.

"Whatever. I need to go pay rent to our landlord. We'll be back by dinner." Steve shouted as he walked out the door, and I could hear him scolding his son for misbehaving as he put him in his carseat in Steve's chevy.

"How was work, Soda?" I croaked out, be he just glared at me.

"I'm leavin'." he muttered, and began to walk out the front door, but Darry told him to stop.

"You're going to stay here and talk to your brother. You can't keep ignoring him."

"Says who?" he asked, still glaring at me.

"Says me. You may be 18 now, but you're still living under my roof."

"I'm not listening to you, Darry." Soda exclaimed, and tried to push past, but Darry pulled him back so he was standing in front of him.

"You can not listen to me when you get your own damn house. Right now, if you plan on leaving you better get all your shit and take it with you because you're moving out. You got that?" Darry yelled, and with wide eyes Soda nodded. Darry didn't really yell at Soda, ever. Soda sat down at the end of the couch, by my feet, but still wouldn't even look at me. Big surprise.

"I realize Pony did something really, really stupid yesterday, but Soda, you can't keep treatin' him like this. He's our little brother and I don't care how pissed off you are, you're talkin' to him."

"Damnit, Darry! He could of died!" Soda bursted outta nowhere. "We coulda lost him! Do you not see that?"

"Yes, I see it, Soda. And that will be dealt with. " Darry spoke calmly to my older brother.

"Yea, I get that. But do you realize the seriousness of this situation? Those damn Socs could of killed you last fucking night. Hell, If I was them I would of! Almost every Soc in a 10 mile radius wants you 6 feet under. Do you did not realize that?!"

"I did." I said quietly, but it wasn't quiet for long for Soda started hollerin' again.

"Then why did you do it?! Are you really that selfish?" he crossed his arms over his chest, and by now me and Darry were starin' at him wide eyed. I've never heard Sodapop go off like this, especially not on me. "You're so selfish I'm startin' to think you don't care if you die! In your eyes, if you die that's just how it is right? Well, I don't care if you care if you die, but I sure as hell do! Everytime you get hurt like you are right now, you're hurting me, and him! All because you're too stupid to think of someone else before you do stupid shit."

By now, I was crying. I've always hated gettin' yelled at. Turns out I hate it even more when it's by Soda. "I'm sorry, Sodapop."

"I don't care about your stupid apology. How about you two just let me be pissed for a couple of days and when I'm in the mood to give a damn about your apology, I'll let you know." And with that, he was gone, slamming the screen door.

"I didn't mean for any of this to happen. I just didn't wanna stay in the house last night, Darry. I swear." I sobbed, putting my face in my hands.

"Glory, Pony, I wish I could make him talk to you, but I can't." Darry said, as he took Soda's spot by my feet.

"It' s not just that. He was right. Everything he said, and I'm sorry." I cried harder, because well, I felt like a dick, and because the sobbing was reigniting the pain in my torso.

"It's okay, Pony. Everything's gonna be okay." Darry murmured as he moved and gently picked me up, then sat back down so I was laying in his lap. I don't care how old I am. If I want to cry into my big brothers chest I'll cry in my big brothers chest.

Especially when I need it as much as I need it right now.


	4. Chapter 4

A couple of days had passed, and I was feeling a bit better. Not fully there, but a hell of a lot better than before. I could sit up by myself, and I could walk with a major limp and some pain.

Of course, I was happy beyond words that I was getting better, but since I was getting closer to better, my punishment was gettin' closer, and I was more scared of what Darry was going to do to me with that strap.

Glory, I was scared.

I knew Dar wouldn't take it too far. Last time he took it 'too far' Dallas and Johnny ended up dead.

But I know what it feels like to be whipped like that, and it fuckin' hurts. Darry's strong. Very. I know the punishment is well deserved, considering I scared my brothers so damn bad, but I didn't mean too, really.

Soda still wasn't talking to me a lot, but I can tell that he's not as mad at me as he was. I think it's just more dissapointment right now, and he's slowly getting over it.

The other day I heard him trying to talk Darry out of strappin' me.

Standard Sodapop.

I sure as hell wish it would of worked, though.

Most of the time, I lay in my bed or on the couch, just reading a book, or doing homework I get from school, even though I haven't been going. Not being able to walk properly is a good excuse to miss school, in my opinion.

I was currently working on an English paper when Soda walked into the bedroom. He must of just got off work.

I didn't expect him to say anything to me. He hadn't said a word since our little agrument the other day. But he spoke anyway, and I damn near choked. "How are you feeling?"

"Uh, better." I answered slowly, eying him oddly, and he obviously noticed.

"You know, Pony, I'm really trying to get over all of the shit that's happened but you're making that kinda hard." he said as he stripped his shirt off.

"Sorry." I murmured. "Just wasn't expectin' it. That's all."

"I know, okay?" Soda said, pulling on a white wife beater. "Can we just move on?"

"No." I furrowed my eyebrows. "You're still mad at me and you're just trying to act like you're not." I could tell he was still mad. Just by the way he was acting.

"I don't know when I won't be mad, Ponyboy. I really don't know. But you're my little brother, and I love you, and I'm not just going to stop talking to you until I find a way to get over this. You dig that?"

"Yeah, I guess." I answered quietly, going back to my homework. Soda sighed, ruffling my hair and kissing the top of my head before leaving the bedroom. He hadn't been staying home a lot. Neither him or Steve, which is why it seemed like Darry ended up with Dally so often.

Steve had never really been the type of father to just dump his child off on other people, even bein' as young as he is, he was a responsible father. But lately he always had Darry babysittin' for him. Him and Soda were always somewhere doin' something. Not just since I got jumped, but before that. And I'm startin' to worry.

Darry knocked on my door, even though it was open. "Hey. You hungry?"

"Not really." I shook my head. Darry was in here every 10 minutes askin' me if I need anything. He worries like a mother.

"You've been awful quiet these last couple of days." Darry said as he sat down beside me on the bed.

"If you knew you'd be getting your ass beat by your big brother you wouldn't be to talkative, neither." I replied, my eyes not leaving my homework.

He let out a puff of air his eyes training on me, but I wouldn't look at him. If I did, I knew I'd cry. I don't know why, but I'd cry. I've been real emotional lately.

"Pony, I feel like there's more to this other than your punishment." he said quietly.

I shook my head, putting my pencil down.

I don't know if there is or not. There's a lot going on in my head. So I just decided to say it.

"I'm just so sick of letting you and Soda down, Dar." My voice cracked, tears fillin' my eyes. "I always do something. Whether it's failing a test, or walking home alone, or missing curfew, it's always me messin' somethin' up, and I'm over it. I don't wanna do that anymore. I don't want Soda and you to be mad at me anymore. I don't want to sit on this bed all day and think about how Johnny dyin' was my fault. I don't want the Soc's after me anymore. I don't want Dally to have to grow up in this city the way it is. I don't want to worry about gettin' beat up all the time. I don't want to keep letting my big brothers down. And I don't want a damn spanking! I just, I just don't know but I'm so mad about everything right now, Dar. I'm...I'm so sorry. It's all my fault. All the Soc and Greaser shit getting worse, and you having to grow up so fast, it's all my fault and I'm sorry I've messed everything up."

Darry didn't say anything, but just hugged me tightly. "Ponyboy, It's okay. Please, stop cryin'." he persuaded, rubbing my back. "You're only 15, buddy. You're gonna make mistakes, and it's okay to worry, but not worry like that. You'll drive yourself mad. You haven't messed everything up. It's not your fault that everythings gotten worse. And you don't let us down. We love you, honey. No matter what, so stop talkin' like that. You hear me?"

I managed to nod, my head buried into Darry's stomach. "I'm sorry, Darry."

"I know, Pony. It's alright. You're going to be alright." he murmured.

I stayed there for awhile until I was all cried out, just hugging my brother like he'd dissapear at anytime. "Can we just get it over with?" I whispered.

"What over with?" he asked, but he answered his own question just a second later. "I don't think you're feeling up to it."

"It's gonna hurt either way. I'd rather get it over with, Dar." I answered, slowly sitting up.

"I really don't want to, Pony. I was hoping I could put it off a little while longer." he smirked to himself.

"I deserve it, and I just want it to be over. All of this." I said quietly, and he nodded.

He left the room, and came back a minute later with Dad's old strap. Just looking at the thing made me want to die.

"Over my knee or over the bed? Your choice." He asked.

I chose over his knee, and he propped one up on the bed, he put a pillow over his knee so my ribs didn't hurt as much, and just like that, we were ready to go.

"I love you, Ponyboy." he said quietly, as I was already bent over his knee.

"I love you, too, Darry." I whispered, and seconds after that the first hit landed.

I screamed. God, I screamed so loud. It hurt so bad, and the noise it made made it worse. Another one fell, then another one. It took no time for me to sobbing my 15 year old heart out. "Stop! I won't do it again. I won't do it again." It had only been 5 hits with the damned thing and I was already begging for it to stop.

"Far from done, little buddy." Darry said, bringing the strap down again.

I was in nothing but a t-shirt in boxers, considering I'd been doing nothing but sitting in bed all day. I sure wish I would of decided to put on some pants this mornin'. I couldn't think long before my mind went back to the pain. "I'm sorry! Ow! Please, Darry!"

He must of had me blocked out, because he kept going. Not slowing down a bit. "Please, I'm sorry. I'm sorry!"

It went on for about a minute before he took a break, leaving me sobbing and gripping his leg so hard my knuckles were white. "I don't want you doing this again. I've got on you way too many time because I didn't want you getting hurt, Pony."

"I won't do it again, I promise." I sobbed. I wasn't doing it again. And if I did I would ask to be strapped for how fucking dumb I was.

"And you've learned your lesson?" He asked, resting his hand on my back, for comfort I'm guessing.

"Yes." I croaked out.

"We're almost done here, then." He said, and I heard the '_whoosh_' sound of the strap coming down, and then once again I felt the pain. And I'm positive he hit me harder than he was before.

I let out a whimper before just staying still. He said he that we were almost done, and I just held on to the fact that it was almost over. He kept his word, and stopped about 20 seconds later.

I didn't even have time to get up before he was pulling me by my armpits, and pulling me into his broad chest.

"Never make me have to do that again, you understand me?" he whispered, his grip tightening on me.

I nodded into his chest, my tears (and snot) soaking his shirt. "N-Never again. You won't ever have to do that again, Dar! I p-promise."

"I believe you, baby." he said, resting his chin on top of my head as I cried. I knew it hurt, but I forgot how damn bad. And I'm sure it was worse with bruised ribs.

Darry eventually layed down on the bed, with me still in his arms. "Go to sleep, little buddy. Everything's gonna be alright."

He rubbed my back until I cried myself into a deep sleep, my arms still wrapped around him.

**There's a lot of shit going down where I live, and I'm so scared...anyway, nice chapter I hope.**


	5. Chapter 5

I woke up with a loud scream, my hair stuck to my sweaty forehead, and tears streaming down my face at 4 in the morning. Another one of those dreams. I hate it. I'm scared, and I'm crying, and I have no idea why.

Less than 30 seconds later, Darry and Soda were in my room. I'm not sure why Soda wasn't in bed yet.

"Ponyboy, are you okay?" Soda rushed, hugging me so my head was in his shoulder. Darry took the place behind me, his hand rubbing my back. I shook me head no at Soda's question. I wasn't okay. And it sucked.

"It's okay, baby. Stop crying. You've did too much of that the past couple of days. " Darry comforted, taking me from Soda.

"Go back to bed little buddy. You have to work in the morning." He whispered to our middle brother, shooing him off.

"Is he gonna be okay?" I heard Soda whisper as I subsided my sobs.

"He'll be fine. You'll talk to him when he wakes up." Darry replied, and Soda kissed my hair before leaving. He must of went back to sleeping in his own room. God forbid he shares one with me. I cried harder at that thought.

"Calm down. What's going on with you? You haven't had one of these dreams in months, honey. I'm starting to think something's really wrong. "

"My ass hurts." I murmured through my sobs. Because that it did. But we all knew that's not what's actually wrong.

"Seriously, Ponyboy. I'm being serious." He chuckled, and I shrugged, using his shirt to wipe my own face.

"Can we talk about it in the morning? I just want to go back to sleep." I said, looking at him and adding "In your bed. With you."

He smirked and nodded, picking me up and carrying me into his room, plopping me down on his bed before climbing in himself. I used him as a pillow, and I actually felt safe. Like nothin' in the world could touch me.

"Ponyboy, get up!" I heard Darry yell for what I'm sure is the 5th time as he shook me.

"Go away." I whined, rolling over and sticking my head into my pillow. Well, his pillow since I was still in his bed.

"Now, Ponyboy." he said sternly, but I completely ignored him as I tried to go back to sleep.

I felt a sharp smack to my ass before my eyes finally shot open and I rolled over to look at my big brother.

"What was that for?" I whined, my hand going back to my behind.

"Not listenin'. It's almost noon for crying out loud. Get out of bed. Now." He said sternly before leaving the room.

I layed back down with a frown. My ass is still sore because of him and I don't have time for his shit. I'm not going to school so why do I have to wake up?

I dozed back off but I'm sure it wasn't even 5 minutes later when I felt the crack of leather hit my ass. I shrieked at that, and my eyes filled with tears as the fire from last night was reignited in my butt. "OW!"

I looked up to see Darry with his belt in his right hand, staring down at me. "I told you to get up."

"I was getting up." I lied, wiping the tear that fell down my cheek with my hand and sniffling.

"Yeah, sure you were." He huffed, sliding his belt back on before sitting down on the bed and pulling me into his side. "Didn't mean to make you cry. I didn't even hit you that hard."

"You don't know your own strength. And still sore from yesterday." I muttered, reluctantly leaning into the hug.

"Hey, you wanted to get it over with." he chuckled, kissing the top of my head.

I shrugged, sitting up and wiping the sleep out of my eyes. "It still hurts."

"It won't forever. Why don't you get a shower and I'll make something to eat?"

"Why doesn't Soda sleep in the bed with me anymore? Like, does he hate me?" I asked out of the blue.

"No, he don't hate you. I'm not even sure what's going on with him and Steve." he sighed, rubbing my back. "They're never here anymore."

"Do you think they're doing somethin' illegal?" I asked, thinking back to when I use to spend to much time at the Shepard's house after Dally and Johnny and died, remembering all the awful things I'd see. Of course, Darry never found out that I was there. He'd of killed me.

"No idea. I hope not. Steve's got a son to take care of and could get him taken from him, and Soda will have to deal with me. I doubt either of 'em want that. Do you know where they've been?"

I hesitated for a moment, considering lying. If I answered honestly, Soda would be in a decent amount of trouble. Darry had _never_ allowed us to be at the Sheperd's house because he was fully aware of what happened there, and how dangerous he was, so he'd kill Soda if he found out. But I also knew that if I didn't him where his other kid brother had been hanging out, he'd skin me, and then he'd skin Soda. I had to make a decision, and thank the heavens above I chose the right one.

"They've been hangin' out over at Tim Sheperd's house." I whispered and I felt like a weight had been lifted up op my shoulders. It felt good to not keep secrets for once.

Darry was quiet for a minute, but had released me from the hug we'd been sharing. I knew that was a bad sign. He stood up, crossing his arms over his broad chest like he always does when he's about to yell at somebody. "How long have you knew?"

His voice came out like a deep growl, and my heart started beating faster. "Uh..A while now, I guess?"

"And you didn't feel the need to tell me?! Were you hangin' out there?"

That's when I knew it would be a decision on whethere to lie or not. I had been to the forbidden place a couple of times, but not enough that I would of been caught without confessing myself. I'd only been there twice since I got caught smokin' grass a couple months ago.

"I've been there a few times, I guess." I answered quietly, deciding to tell the truth again. Darry'd find out again, anyway. Always did.

"Are you serious?!" Darry shouted, and I jumped cause I wasn't expecting it. I should of known it was going to happen. "Sodapop Curtis! Get your ass in here!"

I didn't even know Soda was there at the time. If I did I damn sure wouldn't of picked right now to tell Dar.

Soda lazily walked into my brother's bedroom, a can of actual soda in his hand with a confused look on his face. "Yes, your hiness?"

I sighed, shaking my head. Now was not a good time to be smartin' off.

"Sit down." Darry growled at my 18 year old brother. He tried to ask why, but he was just promptly told to shut the hell up before he obeyed.

He took a seat next to me on the bed, and I avoided eye contact. I wasn't in the mood to see the look on his face when Darry told him how he found out 'bout his whereabouts.

"So, me and dear old Ponyboy here were having a conversation just a few minutes ago about you and Steve and how you're always out and about and never home anymore, yeah?" Darry explained, deathly calmly.

I felt Soda tense up, a reaction I wasn't expecting. I figured he'd seem calm and carefree and really not give a fuck that Darry was mad. But that wasn't the case. He almost seemed..._scared._

"Turns out you, Steve, and even sometimes Pony, have been going to the one place I forbade both of your asses' to go." Darry explained, shaking his head, his arms still crossed over his chest. "Either one of you care to explain?"

"I've only been over there 4 times in total, in my defense." I answered quietly, the best I could to stick up for myself.

Darry just stared at me with a blank expression, obviously not too impressed by my defense.

"His excuse is better than mine. I don't have one." Soda answered, his voice a bit shaky. It was lacking the usual cockiness it held. He was officially scared, and I'm not sure of what.

"Pony, I _just_ punished you yesterday, damnit. And Soda, On your 17th birthday, I remember you and Steve went to the Sheperd's after I told you not to. You were grounded for a while, and I promised you one thing if I ever found out you were there again. And what was that promise?"

It stayed quiet longer than I expected. Both me and Darry staring at Soda, but he just kept lookin' down at the ground. It was that way for a good minute or so before Soda looked up and whispered something that I couldn't make out. Apparently Darry couldn't either because he asked for our brother to repeat himself.

Soda sighed, and his eyes glazed over. "You promised I'd get the strap."

**its been a while o **


	6. Chapter 6

"Wait, What?!" I yelled, standing up out of my seat. "You can't do that, can you?"

"He kind of can. Pretty sure he's made that clear by now." Soda joked, but I didn't miss the tears in his eyes. "But, I mean, not like I've been doing anything _bad_ down there."

"Maybe not," Darry grunted, leaning against the dresser. "But you were there. And that's breaking the rules itself. And, another question, this one is simply out of curiosity. Ponyboy, what were _you _doing down there?"

I stopped breathing for a moment, before realizing I probably needed to answer the question. "I wasn't doin' nothing bad, really. I guess, I had a few beers?"

Darry rolled his eyes, going back to Soda. I'm glad he didn't press on me. My ass still hurt, and I knew I'd probably have to face his wrath again that same day. I _was not _looking forward to it.

"How long has it been that you and Steve have been hanging out around there?" Darry muttered, his tired eyes meeting Soda's.

That was when I realized just how tired he really looked. He worked on a near daily basis for 8 hours, and then he got home and had to take care of us, and then he had to worry about how he was going to have the money to take care of us, and then he did it all over again the next day. Most of the time, I'm pretty sure he's running on caffeine and three hours of sleep. And I'm worried.

"A month, maybe two." Soda answered, finally looking up from the ground to our big brother. Soda was still small compared to Darry, and I was still tiny compared to both of them. Life's hard when you're the kid brother.

"What were you doing down there, to be exact? You don't just go somewhere almost every day that you're not supposed to be at for the fun of it." Darry asked, and I'm pretty sure we both knew the answer to it.

"Well, there are these girls..." Soda trailed off, a goofy smile on his face. That smile had gotten him out of so much trouble, it's not even funny.

"Can't believe you put yourself in this situation for girls, Soda." Darry shook his head, still putting on the angry front. I could tell by his hidden smile that he wasn't really mad anymore. He was probably just too tired.

"Ya shouldn't really be surprised. I'd do a lot of stuff for a pretty girl." Soda said, his eyes going back to the floor.

"I know you would, Sodapop." Darry said, rolling his eyes again, finally standing up straight.

"So, uh, you're mad at us, huh?" I asked, quietly.

"What do you think?" Darry asked sarcastically, crossing his arms again.

"You shouldn't be mad at Pony." Soda spoke up. "At least you shouldn't punish him for this."

"He broke the exact same rule you did, buddy. It would be unfair for me not to." Darry explained calmly, and my heart skipped a beat. I didn't want strapped again. I really, really didn't.

"But he just got spanked yesterday! I heard the whole damn thing!" Soda screeched, and I instinctively scooted a bit closer to him. Soda had always been my protector. And I'm sure he always will be.

"The timing may suck, but it's happening. I love you both. And I swear, I don't want to do this at all. I really, _really_, don't. But it's for your own good, whether you wanna believe it or not." Darry finished his speach as I felt a lump in throat grow. I hated making my big brother feel this way, and I damn sure hated the fact that I'd be going over his knee twice in less than 24 hours.

"I'll go first, then." Soda whispered, standing up.

Darry nodded, and smiled one of his encouraging, toothless, smiles. More of a smirk, but too happy to be a smirk. "Okay, we can do this in you and Pony's room. Go in there. I'll be there in a second."

Soda gave me a smile, and a quick hug before he walked out of the bedroom. I could of broke down right then, but I stayed calm.

Darry was getting ready to go get the strap, but I stopped him by simple wrapping my arms around his torso as tight as I can. Just in a simple hug.

He hugged back, kissing the top of my head. I didn't have to say anything. He didn't have to say anything. We just kind of stayed there for a minute.

"I'm sorry about the promise I made yesterday." I whispered, remembering the conversation we had after the punishment.

"What promise, Pony?" Darry asked. I should of figured he didn't remember.

"Yesterday, I promised that you'd never have to whip me like that again. I didn't even make it a day without breaking that promise." I whispered, and I felt my voice crack. A lone tear slid down my cheek, and I damn near screamed. I was so _tired_ of crying. I just never wanted to do it again.

"It's okay, buddy. We can try again today, yeah?" Darry asked, pulling away from the hug and looking down at me.

I nodded. "Okay."

He kissed my forehead before walking out, shutting the door behind me. I sat down on the bed and pulled my knees to my chest. I immediately began trying to start blocking out sound. I knew what was coming, and boy did I not want to hear it.


	7. Chapter 7

If maybe I could go back to the day when me and Johnny killed that Soc, my life wouldn't be half as different as it is now. Maybe if I'd stayed in the house and just accepted Darry's apology after he hit me, or simply locked myself in my room, maybe things would of went a hell of a lot different. Maybe me and Soda wouldn't even be in this situation.

But then, me and Darry wouldn't of gotten as close as we have. Or maybe I wouldn't saved all of those kids lives, and they'd be dead. Maybe Dally's name wouldn't be Dally. I guess I use the word 'maybe' too much.

I'd stayed with my knees pulled to my chest for what felt like hours, waiting to hear the crack of leather from the other room. They were probably talking. Soda was probably talking himself out of his punishment. Or, knowing him, trying to talk me out of my punishment.

Thinking of my punishment finally allowed my tears to break through. I cried into my arms for what felt like hours until I heard the muffled crack of leather hit skin. Then I cried harder.

It was followed by another, and then another, and I flinched with every sound. I knew how bad it hurt. Soda was tougher than me, always had been, but I knew it still had to of stung.

It went on for what felt like hours, but was probably only 5 minutes or so before it stopped. I felt like my breathing stopped when it stopped. Soda sure as hell took that like a champ, because I didn't hear as much as cry from that room.

It was another 10 minutes before I heard footsteps coming down the hall. I'm sure Darry was comforting him, making him promise to never do it again and all that good stuff during the 10 minutes.

As soon as the door to Darry's room opened and I seen Soda step in, I was hopping into his arms. His eyes were puffy, and his face blotchy, and it was obvious he'd been crying, but he still let out a chuckle when I nearly tackled him to the ground. "Woah, there Pony."

"Are you okay?" I asked, my voice cracking. He had his chin rested on my head, so I felt him nod.

"I'm just fine, Pony. Are you okay?"

I shook my head no, and began to cry again. "I don't want to go in there, Soda."

"I know, honey." He said quietly, rubbing my back. "I know you don't. But, you have to. I never thought I'd say this, but you break the rules, you've gotta pay the price."

"Was it bad?" I asked timidly, looking up at him.

He seemed to think for a second before nodding. "Yeah. But you won't get it as bad as me. I know that for a fact."

I stayed quiet for a little bit, building up the courage to walk out of the bedroom. It took me awhile, but I eventually got it. I released Soda from the hug. "Good luck, little brother."

I nodded, thanked him, and with that, I was out of the door. The walk down the hallway felt like the longest walk of my life. Every step made my heart beat harder, and faster, and my breathing became even more uneven as I went to open the door. I told myself that I'd be strong. That I wouldn't cry before it even started. Maybe I should stop lying to myself.

Darry was sitting on the bed, the strap tossed behind him. He didn't look any more excited to do this than I was.

"Hey, Dar." I said quietly, sitting down on the bed beside him.

"I'm ready to get this over with, Ponyboy. And I never want to do it again." He said back, not even acknowledging my introduction. I don't even think he was mad. Just tired.

"Okay." I whispered, and crawled over his knee on my own. I gasped when my jeans and boxers both ended up at my ankles. I whined a little, because being 15 and being half naked over your brother's lap was a little embarrassing.

"You ain't getting the strap. Just my hand. Between yesterday and today, I feel like you'll feel it enough to get that you need to follow rules through your thick skull. What'dya think?"

I just shrugged, and I swear I could _feel_ him smirk. "Alright. Here we go, then."

I felt his arm snake around my waist to hold me in place before I felt the first smack. It damn sure wasn't the strap, but it still hurt like a bitch. "Ow."

He continued the assault on my ass for a while until I started to cry silently, and that's when he took a break.

"You know why I don't like you at the Sheperd's. Those boys will get you hurt, Ponyboy Curtis, and you know it." He lectured, landing a sharp smack.

"Ow! I..I know! I shouldn't of did it, I'm sorry." I cried, kicking my foot a bit.

"Well, if you know it, why did you do it?"

"Because...I don't know! I'm a kid, I make mistakes." The best explanation I could come up with came out of my mouth. Now that I think about, it's probably the only explanation.

"Yah, God knows that." I heard Darry mutter as he resumed the spanking.

"Please, no more! I get it!" I wailed, trying to squirm my way off of his lap.

"Stay still." He said, punctuating both words with hard slaps to my sit spots. "Stop squirming or I'll add more."

I finally gave up the fight, and just lay still. It seems like the stiller I sit, the more helpless I felt, and the closer to a panic attack I was. My breathing went uneven, and I started to sob loudly. My ability to talk had dissapeared, and I started to see little black spots that weren't actually there.

After this had happened, it took me a while to realize the spanking had stopped. It was now being replaced with a hand rubbing my back. I sighed. It was over.

Darry gently tugged up my underwear and jeans before he stood me up. He stood up too, and hugged me tightly into his chest. "Shush, you're okay." He muttered quietly, rubbing my back.

My arms were still by my side. Not because I didn't want to hug him back, but because I was just too wore out to. Spankings take away all of your energy, let me tell you. My head was still buried into his chest, and I was still sobbing my 15 year old heart out. I didn't feel like saying anything. I had no reason to apologize, because I knew I'd been forgiven by now.

"I believe that this won't happen again any time soon, right?" Darry asked, pulling away from the hug but keeping his hands on my shoulders.

"No time soon." I cried, using the back of my hand to wipe off my face.

"Good that." He said, kissing my forehead and pulling me back into the hug. It took me a couple of more minutes to calm down some, and by then, I felt like going back to sleep even though I'd only been awake for about an hour or two.

"Is that what you gave Soda?" I asked randomly, remembering how Soda said I wasn't going to get it as bad as him.

"Yeah, but with the Strap." Darry murmured quietly.

"Oh, God." I whimpered. I nearly lost it from his hand, the strap must of been 10 times worse.

"He most definitely took it like a champ. Typical Soda." Darry whispered with a small chuckle. After that, I decided I wanted to go see Soda. So, we did.

Soda was laying down on the bed. His hands were behind his head and he was staring up at the ceiling. Once he seen me, he opened his arms and I automatically climbed on the bed and curled into him. My eyes got wet again, but I simply blinked back the tears. I was over it. Darry came into the room, too, after he returned the dreaded strap back to its original position.

He smiled at the sight of us, and sat down on the bed beside us. "So, nobody's mad at eachother for one, right? We're all good?"

"Yeah, I think we are." Soda muttered.

Darry climbed his way inbetween us so that Soda was on his right side and I was on his left in the middle of the bed. We both used him as a pillow and curled into his sides as he threw his arms around us. Darry planted kisses to the tops of both of our heads, and all 3 of us ended up falling asleep just like that.

As brothers.


	8. Chapter 8

A month had passed since Darry had dealt out me and Sodapop's punishment for breaking the 'Stay away from the Shepherd's' rule. Since then, things had calmed down considerably. We were all back to getting along, I was finally back in school, and no spankings had been dished out. Well, one, but it was barely a spanking. Just enough for me to know when and where my 'backtalk' and 'attitude' was and was not appropriate, I guess.

Now, we were perfectly back to normal. I was back to making straight A's, Soda back to being with a different girl every week and working at the DX, and Darry was fondly watching over us, no matter how much we pushed his buttons sometimes.

The only thing that had seemed to be different was that my dreams were back. Ever since the one I had right after getting jumped, they were coming two to three times a week. Darry assumed that it was just because I was sleeping by myself for a while, and he expected them to go away when Soda started sleeping in the bed with me. I did too, honestly, but I guess we were wrong, because they didn't go away.

That was when my biggest brother decided that a trip to the doctor was 'necessary'. I hate doctors with such a serious passion, and Darry was so aware of that, but still didn't take long for him to get annoyed with me when I fought him tooth and nail on taking me. We argued for an hour straight about it, but considering were sitting in the waiting room of our family doctor, I clearly lost.

"Please don't make this hard on the doctor," Darry stated, noticing how I was glaring at the carpet, "He's only doing his job."

"I don't need a doctor, Darry," I muttered back, not looking up at him, "I'm fine."

"You're fine now, but not when you wake screaming in the middle of the night, Pony," Darry sighed, and petted my head. I wanted to move away from the touch, but it was comforting.

"Fine," I huffed, just as we were called back to the room.

"Be good," Darry whispered sternly as we got up to head to the desired place, and I rolled my eyes, not really caring if he seen or not. I knew Darry wasn't at the embarrassingly chastising me in front of someone else stage just yet, and by the time we left we'd leave, he'd of forgotten I even did it. So, I was in the clear.

"So Ponyboy, I hear your nightmares are back," the doctor started, and Ponyboy had to fight not to roll his eyes, because that was something Darry would remember. "What's been going on?"

I immediately looked at Darry to explain for me, which he was already prepared to do. I never jumped in, just simply nodded at some point and times. This is the same doctor Darry took me to the last time I had the dreams, so of course he knew all of the information that was being told to him but still felt the need to ask. That annoyed me.

Once they'd finally finished the pointless conversation, the doctor turned his attention back to me. "How's school been, Ponyboy?"

"Good, I guess," I said quietly, shrugging.

"Have there been any changes there that may have caused you to be stressed out?" He asked, picking up his clipboard and pen.

"The school year's almost over, so we're doing some final tests. I've been kinda worried about those I guess, and I been studying a lot." I explained, never really looking at the doctor.

He nodded, jotting something down on his clipboard. "Stress could be a cause of the dreams."

"So, after the tests, they should die down?" Darry asked, leaning forward in his chair, his elbows resting on his knees.

"Probably, yes," He replied, "The only thing else I can recommend is that he gets more sleep. If your sleeping schedule is all crooked, it's going to make them worse."

"Yeah, right," I muttered sarcastically, looking at my feet. I knew the doctor hadn't heard me, but considering I looked up just in time to see Darry glaring at me. I looked down again and sighed.

"At 15, most kids that have these dreams have outgrown them by now," The doctor stated reading over my charts. "You still don't remember what happens in the dreams, do you?"

"If I did would we be here?" I replied, and I could _feel_ the glare that was sent to me by my big brother.

"No," he recovered for me, his eyes never leaving me, "He doesn't remember them."

The doctor seemed rather unfazed by my attitude, not even bothering to look at me. "Has any traumatic experiences occurred that may of triggered them?"

The question was directed to me, but I ignored him, so Darry (unhappily) answered for me, "He got jumped."

The doctor eyes widened for a slight second before he went back to his neutral facial expression he'd had since we'd walked in. "Was there any physical harm?"

"I got jumped, what the hell do you think?" I retorted. I was fully aware that Darry was goin' to kill me when we left this place, but seriously, the doctor was asking idiotic questions.

Darry blew off my reply, getting the Doctor's attention before he had time to address me. "He got pretty messed up, but nothin' serious or long term. He was back on his feet in a week or two. Why? Do you think it has something to do with the nightmares?"

He nodded, writing down another note. "And his attitude? Is that new?"

I was, to say the least, offended. Especially since he didn't even look at me when he said it. Before I could actually say something, Darry, once again, was ahead of me on it, not giving me the chance to be rude.

"Nope, just Ponyboy being Ponyboy," he said with a chuckle, leaning back in his chair.

I glared at him, and I know he seen me, but he didn't make any eye contact. Bastard.

"Oh, teenagers," the doctor chuckled back, and I squinted at him.

"Or, maybe we can stop talking about me like I'm dead," I replied back, rolling my eyes again.

The doctor shrugged, feigning innocence, and winked at my brother as he walked towards the door. "You guys can come on out to the front desk. I'm gonna get you a prescription for something that should help you sleep better at night. It's about the only thing I can think of that will stop them. If it doesn't work, you'll have to wait them out. Just like last time, they'll go away soon and you'll be back to normal. I forgot to ask, how often were you getting them before you got jumped?"

"Like, twice a month," I decided to answer for myself, because Darry was probably already plotting to yell at me for my attitude before it anyway.

"Yeah, the stress and getting jumped is probably causing this. When we get up front, the secretary can get you set up for an appointment in a month, after school's ended and you've had time to fully recover and see if everything's died down."

With that, he walked out expecting us to follow him. I sighed, pulling on my jacket and hopping off the table I'd been sitting on. I started walking towards the door, trying to avoid being in the room alone with Darry for too long, but since before I could make it out of the room he'd already managed to grab me by my arm and swat me, it didn't work out.

"Ow!" I shouted, more at the shock than the actual hurt of it, and spun around to look at my brother. "What was that for?"

I already knew, of course, but Darry was ready to reply, "You being a brat. Now, go."

I glared at him for a split second before turning around and sulking out of the room.

For some reason, I had a feeling it was going to be a rough ride home.


	9. Chapter 9

I stayed quiet while Darry got the medicine from the doctor. I knew he was probably already going to lecture me until I die about my attitude and all that good stuff, so I decided giving him any more lip was out of the question.

It's not my fault, well, _entirely_ my fault. I hate doctors! Especially doctors that treat me like I'm either stupid or five. And Darry knows that! So maybe he won't even bother lecturing me, and just let it go?

Yeah, of course he didn't. The ride home was me trying to justify my actions, and him wearing his usual 'I'm disappointed in you' scowl as he continuously lectured me. Yeah, maybe I was a brat, but did he _really_ have to lecture me for half an hour?

It wasn't the worst that could of happened, of course I knew that. I could of been spanked, or grounded, or just competely ripped into and yelled at, and I didn't want any of the above. So I just stared at my hands in my lap and frowned as I listened to my big brother go on and on and on.

Once we finally did pull up in front of the house, I took no time getting out of the truck and into the houe. I quickly walked past Sodapop and the gang with a major frown on my face, not bothering to look at their faces. I'm sure they were confused, but Darry would explain.

I slammed the door to my room, plopping down onto my bed with an unhappy sigh. I was at the point where I knew that it was pretty much all my fault, but there was no way my pride was going to let me actually _apologize._ Darry would come lecture me some more and I would say 'Okay.' and I'm sure that would be the end of it.

*break*

I was right, of course. Within the hour I was out in the living room joking with Darry and the rest of the gang. We were having our usual fun, throwing food at eachother during Pizza night, which landed on every Friday night. We were wrestling around, and Darry was actually joining in instead of repramanding us before we hurt ourselves (or eachother.)

I kind of wish he would of did a little bit less joining in and a little more repremanding.

Why you may ask? Becuase Steve went to slam me down on the couch, and I managed to land wrong. And then I broke my arm. In two different places.


	10. Chapter 10

Having a broken bone is something you never knew hurt as bad as it did until it actually happened to you, let me tell you that.

The whole rideto the hospital was excruciating in general, and not just physically. Steve was sitting on my left sputtering out apologies, and I was curled up into Soda's side blubbering about how my arm was hurting so bad while Soda tried to calm me down and Darry was hollering at Steve to _please shut the hell up, you're making it worse._

I eventually just kind of blacked out, and didn't really come to until there was a nurse entering an IV into my arm, and neither of my brothers were anywhere to be found.

Considering I already hate doctors enough without them surrounding me, one of them sticking a needle in my arm, and without my two big bad protecters by my side, I was not thrilled, to say the least.

I quickly tried to rip my arm away, which didn't work - luckily considering there was a needle in my arm - since there was a nurse holding my arm down.

They then began giving me the average rant, trying to explain to me that I need to be calm and that they were putting me under anesthesia so they could pop my the broken bones back into place, and then put it into a cast.

At the time, I wasn't necessarily thinking straight, so I ignored them, yelling loudly and proudly for Soda and Darry.

That was around the time that the anesthesia kicked in, and I had no choice but to lay back down as the fight drained out of me. The last thing I heard was Darry yelling at a nurse outside of the room, asking why the hell I was screaming my head off.

_***break***_

I woke up, in a hospital bed, and the IV still in my arm, but Darry and Soda were in the room, too, so I was calm.

But _damn_, are the light always this bright?

I squinted, turning my head so I was looking at Darry, who apparently had just realized I was awake. He stood up, standing closer to my bed and brushing my bangs out of my face.

"Hey, honey," He said quietly, and I leaned into his touch. I looked down at my arm, and it was in a cast. "You feelin' okay?"

I nodded, but winced once I'd tried to say something. "M-My throat, can I get some water?"

Darry nodded, grabbing the cup that had already been filled from the table beside me. "You gotta sit up some so you don't choke."

I whined at that, but eventually he just sat me up himself, propping pillows behind my back and held the cup up for me to get a drink.

Once I'd gotten a drink is when I realized that Sodapop had managed to curl up into a ball in the chair and fall asleep, a scowl on his face.

A small smile came to my face when I looked at him, and Darry followed my view and smiled at him, too.

"Soda," he called gently, sitting back down in his own chair. "Wake up, Sodapop,"

Soda stirred, squinting the same way I did when I'd first woke up. His eyes landed on me, and he smiled his goofy smile. "Welcome back, Pony."

I chuckled a bit, before frowning when my eyes landed on a clock. "It's already midnight? How long was I out?"

"Only about 2 hours, really," Darry shrugged, "It was already late when we got here, and after they fixed your arm and put a cast on it, it was already after 10."

"They said you can go home once a doctor comes and signs you out, and we think your okay to leave." Soda filled in, taking a sip of my water.

"The doctor supposed to check in soon, but I can go find a nurse or something," Darry stated, and I nodded in agreement.

Darry walked out of the room as I was fighting off a yawn. "Where's Steve at?"

Soda barked out a quick laugh at that, "Still at our house with Two-Bit and Dally worryin' his ass off."

"He's still freaking out?" I asked, because Steve's hated me my whole life, or atleast he's always acted like it.

"I think he's more scared of Darry kicking his ass more than he is worried about your arm," Soda stated with a laugh, "But, yes, he's still freaking out."

I laughed lightly, because it sounded realistic. "Darry ain't actually mad at him, is he?"

Soda shook his head, standing up to stretch. "Nah, but Superman figures he might as well mess with him for a while."

And Superman himself walked back into the room right after that, a tall doctor following behind him, paperwork in his hand.

God, I hate doctors.

But I tried to be civil, but couldn't help the eye rolls I let out after some of his questions. I'm sure Darry noticed, because at some point in time when the doctor was lookin' down he flicked my thigh.

After that, though, he seemed to have been over it, helping me get dressed out of the hospital gown I was in back into the clothes I'd came in. And after that - thank god - I got to go home.

The medicine had made me sleepy, despite my 'nap' in the hospital. I was out like a light before we ever made it home. I woke up for a second when I was being layed down on my bed by Darry, and I muttered a complaint, but it didn't matter, I was asleep again in seconds.

I woke up around four that morning, and my arm was propped up on pillows, and Soda's arm was thrown over the middle of me. I yawned, feeling my stomach grumble.

"Seriously," I muttered, becuase it four in the morning and I was freakin' hungry. I hadn't ate much dinner, so I guess I understood. I did the best I could to move away from Soda without waking up, but I failed.

"Mmm, where're you goin'?" he slurred, his eyes barely opening to look at me.

"Bathroom," I lied, not wanting him to worry about making me something to eat. "I'll be back."

He easily went back to sleep after that, murmuring something about me letting him know if I needed something.

I walked quietly of the room and down the hallway, peaking in to Darry's room to see if he was asleep. To my own surprise, he was. He was starfished in the least graceful way on his stomach, his face pressed firmly against a pillow, his mouth open, and snoring quietly.

And it looked like that was the best sleep Darry had gotten in a year.

I continued my way to the kitchen, flipping on the light. I checked the living room, and Two Bit was asleep on the floor, while Steve was asleep on the couch with his two year old sprawled out across his chest, his thumb in his mouth.

I laughed a little while turning back to the kitchen, deciding to just grab a bag of chips and eat some of 'em. They'd hold me over until Darry made breakfast.

The only trouble I'd really had was that having your arm in a cast and trying to open a bag of chips isn't all that easy, but I eventually figured out.

"What are you doin' up, Pony?" Darry said from behind me, managing to scare the living shit out of me.

After I calmed down from the chips I was choking on, I answered. "I got hungry."

He snorted a bit, rubbing at his eyes. "You can go back to bed, Dar, I'm just gon' let my stomach settle then go lay back down."

Darry ignored me - not sure why I didn't expect that - and sat down beside me at the table.

"I want to talk to you about somethin' I seen in your room when I layed you down, earlier."

My heart skipped a beat, even though I knew I hadn't did anything bad recently, it was still all touch and go with Darry, and things from the past can be brough up with the snap of his fingers.

"Yeah, and?" I pushed, my hands sliding out of the chips bag.

He sighed, resting his head on his hand. "Remember last week when you and those kids from school went out and about?"

Oh fuck. Oh _fuck._ "Yeah."

"And the next morning a cop showed up at our door asking about how a group of boys were in a gas station, and some of them stole cigarettes, and you swore to me that your friends had did that after you'd came home, that you'd had nothing to do with it?"

Fuck. Jesus Christ, Fuck. This, this is _NOT_ good. "Yeah." My voice was starting to waver.

"I seen the carton of cigarettes under your bed, Pony. I know you did it."

jesus pony :( kid can't stay out of trouble.

anyways, extra long chapter :) hope you enjoy, comment opinions please.


	11. Chapter 11

My breath was hitched, and I felt a lump in my throat growing. I knew I was caught, I just wish it hadn't taken so long for him to find out, that way I'd never thought that I'd gotten away with it in the first place. It would make this so much easier.

I don't need to explain to you what happened the night I did it, it was stupid, and I felt pressured, so I just did. And glory I was so damn scared when that cop showed up. And I felt so bad lying to the whole gang's face that morning. But I was scared of the amount of the trouble I would of been in.

Not necessarily with the cops, but more with Darry. I was going to lie to the cops no matter what, but I know now and knew then that I should of told him as soon as the cop drove off.

But I didn't, I decided to lie. And _fuck, _this is going to suck.

"I know it's not the kind you smoke," he said slowly, "So, please, don't try to lie to me again. This will already be bad enough."

I shook my head fast, looking up at him. "I wasn't...I wasn't going to lie."

He sighed and nodded, before unsuccessfully fighting off a yawn. "We can talk about it in the morning, you need to get a few more hours of sleep."

I had no intentions of going back to sleep, so when he stood up, I just stayed in my chair.

He looked down at me, rolled his eyes, and then sat right back down. "Okay, we can talk about it now, then," With a sigh, he asked the million dollar question. "Why? Why did you do it, and why did you lie to me about it?"

I felt tears stinging my eyes, because fuck, why am I so damn s_tupid_? "I just..." My voice cracked before I could stop it. "My friends dared me, and I didn't want to not do it..so I just did. And I lied to y'all because I was scared. I didn't want you to be mad at me, again."

Darry just sighed again, leaning back into his chair."Pony...You can' t just lie about something like that, somethin' so serious, okay? Even if you think we'll be mad at you, you gotta tell us, okay? It would make things run so much smoother."

I nodded, quickly wiping the one tear that fell from my eye.

"And for future reference, just telling me instead of letting me find out myself will save yourself trouble, alright? Don't lie to me, it means I can't trust you."

Okay, ouch. That hurt. I sniffled, nodding again. "Are you mad?"

He shook his head, indicating that he wasn't. "It's nearly five in the morning, I'm too damn tired to be mad, Pony."

"Soda's gonna be mad." I muttered back, ignoring that he was pretty much telling me to go back to bed.

"Probably, Pony," he answered, yawning again, "That's something we'll have to deal with, yeah?"

"Just sucks," I replied, shrugging.

Darry nodded, standing up again and kissing the top of my head. "It'll be fine, just go to bed and we'll talk with Soda tomorrow."

I finally did go back to bed, letting Darry prop my arm back up for me. I moved it once he'd left though, getting as close to Soda as I could. He tossed an arm around me again, resting his head on mine.

"Soda?" I asked quietly, my face buried into his chest.

"Yes, honey?" He asked, his eyes peeking open.

"I'm sorry," I stated, my heart beat speeding up. I just kept telling myself to not cry again, I'm sure Darry would give me plenty of reasons for tears soon.

"Why, Pony?" He seemed more awake now, probably worried about me.

"Promise you won't yell at me," It sounded childish, sure, but being precatious ain't wrong.

"I promise, Ponyboy. Now, why are you sorry?"

I sighed, preparing for the worst, before I let the whole story spill out of my mouth, ending in another apology.

My big brother tensed a little, but he didn't yell, he didn't even scoot away from me. He propped himself up on one elbow, looking down at me with a scowl that I could see from the dim light from the rising sun. "Ponyboy."

"I know, I know, I was stupid, and I'm sorry, please don't get mad at me like you did last time, I really can't handle that, Soda. Please." I whined, looking up at him with tears in my eyes.

He sighed, brushing his fingers through my hair. "You're right, you were very damn stupid, and Darry's really gonna give it to you for this one, but I'm not gonna yell at you or anythin' else, right now, okay? Just go back to sleep for a while, and we can talk later. Me, you, and Superman."

I nodded, burying my head into his chest because fuck it, if he's gonna be pissed at me in a few hours I might as well take all the comfort I can get.


	12. Chapter 12

**i started this story over a year ago omg, anyway, i've had three really quick updates, to make up for the extremely slow ones i'd been doing. hope you enjoy, comment opinions!**

I woke up that morning to Dally jumping up and down on the bed to wake me and Soda up. I squinted at him, and so did Soda before we both just buried our heads into our pillows.

"Steve! Get your son!" Soda yelled, but Dally just jumped onto him, giggling louder.

"Wake up, Boda!" he chuckled, latching on to Soda's neck and burying his face into it.

"Get off of me," Soda chuckled, gently pushing the little boy back. "You little shit."

Dally laughed again, before running out of the room. "Daddy! Wha's a 'little shit'?"

I broke into uncontrollable laughter at that, and Soda sighed, shaking his head before glaring at me. "You're a little shit, too."

And then he tickled me until I couldn't breathe. Standard Sodapop.

It actually made me pretty happy because it was morning and nobody was yelling at me yet, and Soda is still my best friend and I can hear Darry laughing in the kitchen making dinner and that made my heart beat calmly, despite knowing that I wasn't going to be able to sit down by the end of the day.

Nobody was too pissed off at me. Fuck yeah.

I heard Steve and Two-Bit say that they had to go, saying that they'd be back later - big surprise - and then I heard the slam of the door.

"Up and attem, boys," I heard Darry's footsteps, making their way to our bedroom. "Come eat breakfast."

I groaned, because my bed just seemed so much more comfortable. Soda did the same.

"C'mon, both of you," Darry said with a fond smile, throwing a towel at me.

"Fine," Soda pouted, throwing the towel back at Darry before pushing me off of the bed.

"Soda!" Darry reprimanded, helping me up, "Be careful, he's already in a cast."

Soda was still smiling when he rolled his eyes, pulling on a t-shirt. "Yeah, Yeah, Yeah."

I threw a pillow at him, quickly running out of the room when I heard him following. I made it all the way to the living room before he caught up to me, which is when he threw a pillow back at me.

The only difference is I ducked and the pillow knocked a lamp off a table. It broke - more like the light bulb completely shattered - all over the floor.

Me and Soda both froze and held our breaths as Darry came down the hallway, worry in his eyes. That was quickly replaced with a brief flicker of anger, before he just closed them. He drug a hand down his face, sighing through his nose.

"It was an accident, Superman," Soda muttered, "Promise."

Darry nodded, opening his eyes again. "Just go sit down and eat, I'll be there after I clean this up. We need to talk."

We all knew what that meant, and I frowned. Carefully stepping around a couple of pieces of glass and shuffled behind Soda into the kitchen. "You don't think he's mad about that, do you?"

Soda shook his head, grabbing some food from the counter and handing me a plate. "Probably just annoyed, he'll live."

I scoffed. "Yeah, more like we'll live."

Soda laughed, cuffing the back of my head lightly before he sat down a the table. I frowned, remembering exactly what Darry wanted to talk about when he walked into the kitchen again. Soda noticed my distress, because when I sat down beside him he bumped his leg against mine and winked at me.

"Did you tell him?" Darry asked me, and I nodded, sighing.

"You don't seem very upset with him, Soda..." Darry said slowly, looking between Soda and I.

He shrugged, stabbing his eggs with his fork. "I'm not..Not really. I mean, I'm not real happy with him, what he did was stupid, but I'm not gonna do what I did last time, it's stupid."

Darry drug a hand down his face, sighing, "I was really hoping you would be the bad guy so I wouldn't have to."

Soda chuckled, I glared at him. "Or nobody could, I like that idea, too, y'know?"

Darry snorted at me, sitting down at the table with Soda and I. "Yeah, I bet. Did you ever plan on telling us?"

I shrugged, because honestly, I'd forgot about it already. "Probably not, honestly."

"You couldn't think of a better place to hide them, though, Pony? 'Cause that's really my main concern. I'm worried about your sneakiness, honestly." Soda teased, pushing his plate away.

"Don't encourage him," Darry said with a smile, and I glared at both of them with a blush.

"I hate both of you," I rolled my eyes, but we all knew I meant the complete opposite.

"Anyway," Darry said, taking me and Soda's finished plates from us. "Back on topic."

"Or we can talk about anything but that," I reccomended, "Like..Kittens, or some shit."

Darry completely ignored me, going on with the subject. "I'm sure that you're fully aware that robbing a gas station is a terrible idea."

"It wasn't _my_ idea, Dar," I started, but he just held a hand up at me, leaning against the kitchen counter.

"But you went with it, which is also a terrible idea, Ponyboy Curtis," He said, crossing his arms over his chest, his usual 'Hey, look at me, I'm intimidating as _fuck_.' stance.

"I know," I whimpered quietly, playing with my hands so I didn't have to look at either of my brother's expressions. "It was stupid, I know."

I was reaching that point in the conversation where I knew I was gonna cry, so I started blinking fast and looking up at the light. Once that didn't work, I just buried my face into my arms so neither of them had to see me.

"C'mon, don't do that," Soda said quietly, rubbing my back. "It's okay, honey."

I heard Darry walk towards me, and then I felt a hand rest on my head. "I know you don't want to talk about this, Ponyboy, I know you don't like being trouble, but actions come with consequences, you know that."

I hiccuped, wiping my tears off the sleeve of my shirt.

"And you knew that stealing and then lying to us would give you some pretty shitty consequences," Darry continued, his fingers scratching gently at my scalp.

"And Darry is gonna deal with this, and then everything's gonna be okay, like the times before, right?" Soda added on, kissing my temple.

I sniffled, nodding once. "I'm sorry."

Soda hummed, standing up from his chair. "We know, it's okay."

I heard him saying something to Darry, something about leaving, but I had already buried myself in my own mind trying to find the best way to get out of the situation I'd managed to get myself in to actually listen.

"Pony, c'mon, go to you and Soda's room, I'll be there in a second." Darry spoke softly, patting my shoulder.

I sniffled again, louder this time and use the back of my hand to scrub at my face before I lifted my head up. I didn't look at Darry though, just quickly shuffled to my bedroom. I curled up on the bed, grabbing a pillow and crying in to it. I'm not sure why I was crying exactly. Of course I was scared of getting strapped, but at the same time I hated disappointing my brother's a lot more, and that made me feel so guilty and unbelievably _stupid_. My tears were eventually just a reflection of my own self-pity.

I don't think I realized exactly when Darry walked in - strap in hand, of course - but I do remember flinching when he started rubbing my back again. "It's okay, Pony, you're okay," he reassured, and I choked on a sob.

"I don't want..I don't want a spanking," I cried into my pillow, it becoming harder and harder to breathe because of how hard I was crying.

"I know, baby, I know," He said quietly, and his voice sounded strained. "I don't want to spank you. But the quicker you calm down and the quicker we do this the quicker were done and can move on."

"It's gonna hurt," I whimpered out, and boy did it sound pitiful.

"Yes, that's the point," Darry said, lifting me up some so I was leaning against him. "But think about last time, okay? It hurt for a couple of days, and then it stopped, right?"

I nodded, my breathing become more even as I leaned into my brother's side.

"Then you know that even though it's gonna hurt, you'll be fine, little brother. I'm not killin' you, kid, you'll see the light of day, again, I promise."

I chuckled a little bit at that, nodding. "Okay."

"Okay," Darry whispered back, shifting to the side of the bed where the strap was. He pointed to his lap. "Over."

I whined in one last attempt to get out of this, but I still listened. I wasn't wearing any pants, and he was letting me keep my boxers on, so there was nothing to take down. His hand went around my waist, pulling me closer to him. I grabbed on to his ankle for dear life, listening to the sound the Strap made while it was coming down at full speed.

As usual, the sound rang out before the actual pain hit me, but once it did, I nearly bit Darry's thigh it hurt so bad.

It was shitty, the whole thing, and I felt like it was going to last forever.

The strapping itself was terrible, horrible, fucking _painful _and I sobbed and screamed the whole time, I thought it was never going to end. But once it did, I've never been so grateful to get a hug in my life.

The after strapping cuddle lasted longer than the actual punishment did. I was curled up in his lap for a good hour, and I was pretty content (after I'd stopped crying, at least.) about it.

"You okay, Pony?" Darry asked softly, kissing my forehead.

I scrubbed at my eyes, nodding into his chest. "Yea, I'm fine. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, I forgave you," Darry said, messing up my hair. "Just never do something like this again, okay? If you do something stupid from now on, tell me, Pony. Because what you just got wouldn't of been half as bad as if you would of just told me and Soda, instead a lying to us."

I nodded again, wincing at the reminder of the sting in my ass. "I will, trust me."

**it's after 2 in the morning lol i really wanted to get this chapter done! **

**anyway, comment ideas for what i should do next, maybe? i'm kind of having writer's block with this story.**


	13. Chapter 13

I must'a fell asleep at some point and time on Darry, because I woke up at some point and time on the couch. Well, I was woke up, I should say. By Dally, again.

I'm guessing wherever Soda went, he went with Steve because they showed up together, and automatically set the two year old on me.

I was laying on my stomach, so when Dally jumped on me he landed right on my ass.

My poor, sore, bruised ass.

I yipped almost immediately, turning over and nearly tossing Dally off of the couch. Steve caught him rather quickly, instict kicking in, frowning at me.

I almost tried to roll onto my back, but flinched when my backside touched the couch, so I settled for laying on my side.

"Kid, what's wrong with you?" He asked, hugging his startled son. Before I got the chance to answer, I could see he figured it out himself. His eyes narrowed, and he smirked. "You got whipped."

I glared at him, and I could feel all of my blood rush to my face. "Shut up."

"Oooh, you got whipped!" He said a bit louder this time, being the child that he is. And then he repeated it a few times.

I reached down and grabbed a shoe off of the floor, launching it at him. Needless to say, I missed and hit a glass that was sitting on a table. All of the water spilled, and of course the glass broke, quite loudly, may I add.

Darry and Soda were in the room in seconds, glaring at both me and Steve.

Steve automatically pointed at me, and then Dally did, too, giggling.

"Seriously, Ponyboy?" Soda asked, picking up the shoe that been thrown, throwing out to the porch for it to dry.

"He was teasing," I muttered, sitting up the best that I could considering my situation.

"It was hardly teasin'," Steve rolled his eyes, adjusting his son so he could rest his head on his shoulder, his eyes drooping. "I just stated a fact."

"Repeatedly," I shot back. "And you knew it was botherin' me."

"What did he even say?" Darry asked, throwing a towel over the huge wet spot on our carpet.

"That he got whipped, I could tell when Dally jumped on him and he nearly threw him."

"You said it over and over again, and I didn't throw him." I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Childish, Steve, really childish," Darry scolded, shaking his head at him. "Room, Ponyboy."

I glared at all three of them before stomping off into the bedroom, slamming the door behind me. Why did I have to go to my room? Steve was the one being a child about the situation, but I had to go sit by myself in my room. I groaned, cursing my big brother and flopping onto my stomach on the bed, hugging my pillow. My ass _hurt_. Like, worse than ever. And I really hope Darry don't plan on as much as swatting me for this incident, because if he does I think I'll cry for another two hours.

When I buried my head into a pillow is when I heard the door open and then close gently. "Pony." Soda said, sitting on the bed beside me.

"Go away," I said into the pillow. I don't want to see you either."

"I didn't ask," He said, seeming to not even notice the anger in my tone. "Why are you so upset?"

"I didn't want Steve to know, and he was being childish, and now I'm gonna be in trouble for throwing the damn shoe, and I shouldn't of even got sent in here, it's not fair." I listed, probably sounding like a 4 year old.

"Oh, Pony, it's not that big of a deal, and Steve left. I told him not to make wisecracks about it, that you don't like it and I'm sure since I told him he'll stop. And even though he was being stupid, you knew better than to launch a shoe at him. He was holding Dally, you know? What if it would of hit him?"

I didn't think of that, honestly, and I probably would of asked to get my ass kicked again if I had hit him. I may have a strong hate for his father sometimes, but Dally was the light of the gang. And I loved the kid.

Before I had time to speak back, Soda continued. "And Darry sent you in here for a little while to calm down and so you didn't blow up on one of us and get into more trouble, okay? It wasn't to piss you off."

"Oh." was all I managed, not even taking my head out from the pillow. "I'm sorry."

Soda scratched the back of my head, humming at me. "It's okay, Pony."

Darry walked in then, his heavy footsteps loud in the quiet room. "Soda, go watch dinner for a few minutes, we'll be there."

Soda nodded, and I automatically missed his presence when I felt him get up and leave. When he did, he shut the door behind him, and I wasted no time standing up and hugging Darry.

"Woah, there, kiddo," His deep voice rumbled, and I buried my head into his chest. "I expected you to yell at me."

"I was going to, then I realized it was stupid and this is probably my fault, anyway," I said, shrugging.

"Probably?" He asked, laughing a bit and I frowned at him.

"Steve had some fault in it," I declared, rolling my eyes.

"Yea, well, steve didn't launch a boot at anybody."

"'m sorry 'bout that," I grumbled. "Am I in trouble?"

"You're grounded for the rest of the week, no leaving the house unless it's with me or your brother." He stated, his arms squeezing me a bit.

"But I was suppose to go the movies with my friends this weekend, Dar," I fought, pulling back from the hug.

"Tough," He said, "And no sneaking out this time, I'll be home all weekend."

I frowned again, because this fucking sucks. I didn't bother saying anything, just followed when he told me to come to dinner. I'd figured I'd try again later, I still had a couple of days.

**oh pony...do you ever learn?**


	14. Chapter 14

"Ow! Ow! OW!" I yelled at my big brother as he landed swat after swat on my backside, holding me up by my elbow, "Soda, please! I'm sorry!"

"I can't BELIEVE you!" He roared, dragging me from the living room to my bedroom, sitting down on the bed and draping me over his lap. "After last time, you were _still_ willing to try and sneak out!"

He hadn't slowed down a bit with the spanking, and even though it was only with his hand I'm almost sure it hurt more than anything I'd ever gotten before, and maybe that was because it was Soda this time, and he was _pissed_. Like, more than pissed.

I was dumb enough to try and sneak out, again, but Soda caught me. Darry had to go get Two-Bit, who in a drunken fit attempted to rob a gas station, which I will go into details with later.

"Soda!" I yelled as he yanked my jeans and boxers down. "Soda, please! I'm sorry, Bub! Pleeeaaseee!"

I was digging out old nicknames to call him, doing my best to stop the spanking that was occuring. He ignored me, methodically continuing to spank me. I wanted to get up and run, but he had a tight grip on me, so I just layed my head down and accepted my fate, sobbing all the way through.

Once I did that, he lightened up, resting his hand on my back. "Why? Why are these stupid movies so important that you want to keep going through this? I know you aren't enjoying this in the least bit."

"I'm n-not!" I agreed quickly, choking on a sob. "I don't know, 'm sorry! It was stupid, I won't do it again!"

"You said that last time," Soda pointed out, but he did stop spanking, rubbing a hand up and down Pony's spine. "It didn't work out, did it?"

"It w-will this time, I promise!" I sputtered out, trying to get some type of control of myself.

I heard him sigh and then lift me up, gently placing me on his lap. "Alright, it's okay."

I cried into his shoulder, holding on to him as tight as I could with my good arm, tucking my arm that was in a cast between my body and his.

"You know Darry's probably going to have another go at you for this, right?" He murmured, running his fingers through her hair.

"Noooo!" I sobbed into his shoulder, shaking my head. I was still sore from a few days ago, what Soda just gave me hurt like hell, and Darry's wrath was not something I was in the mood for.

Soda didn't say anything, just continued to hold me until I was just hiccupping, lifting me up and taking me to the living room. I layed down on my stomach on the couch, grabbing a pillow to smush my face in. "Just wait for Dar to get back, kiddo,"

He sat at my feet, flicking on the TV. I tried to keep my mind off my stinging ass, and how it would sting even more soon by thinking of Two-Bit.

Two Bit had always had a bit of a drinking problem, but his heart was always in the right place, and he was never really harsh. Just a light hearted kid who drank way too much. But this time, it had gotten him into trouble, apparently.

He went to a gas station - the same gas station Dallas robbed right before he did - and started doing shit, weird shit, and tearing things up. This wasn't the first time the store clerk had ever been encountered by a rather drunk Two-Bit, it just seems this is the first time the drunk kid had been violent.

The gas station worker that night called Darry, informing him of our friend's situation telling him rather loudly that if we don't come get him, the cops would be there quicker than we could blink.

Darry was out pretty quickly telling me that if I even tried to leave, my ass would be grass. He told Soda to watch me pretty clearly, and Soda agreed, shooting me a look (which I pretty clearly chose to ignore.)

I heard Darry's truck pull into our drive way, and I must of gotten visibly scared because Soda whispered to me "It's okay, we'll talk before I let him do anything, okay? Calm down."

Darry walked in, his eyes automatically falling on my tear stained face. His eyesbrows came down as he shut the door behind him. "What's wrong?"

It was quiet for a second before Soda answered. "He's gotten himself into some trouble."

Darry knew what that meant, not pressing for more details. "What did he do?"

I felt myself choke on a sob before I could stop it, tears already threatening to fall out my eyes. I buried my face into the pillow as I heard Soda quietly explain it to him, rubbing my leg to try and keep me calm.

I felt the immediate change in the atmosphere and I just knew Darry was going to be a whole new level of pissed.

_Oh my god, why did I do this?_

"Are you kidding me?" He asked, his voice extremely low and no no no, he's gonna yell.

"I can't _believe_ you!" I was right. "How many times do I have to whip your ass for you to know-"

"Darry!" Soda stood up and cut our brother off, putting his hands in front of him. "Stop yelling at him."

He looked down at me briefly before nodding towards our bedroom, and I got out of dodge quicker than I thought was imaginable. I flopped onto our bed curling up and using a pillow to rest my head on. I tried not to cry too hard, only letting a few tears roll down my cheeks.

Soda's voice remained soft and calm, and I heard him explaining to Darry that he had already spanked me and that I'd apologized a billion times already. And I was sincerely sorry for that.

When it came to sneaking out, I'd only made it halfway down the street before Soda had me by the ear and was (embarrasingly) dragging me back to the house.

It had gotten quiet for a while in the living room before I heard Darry whisper "I don't know what to do with him."

That scared me a lot, because what does he mean by that? Is he gonna send me to a boy's home? Or just stop trying to help me in general? I hate stressing him out this much, I wish I could just make myself stop sometimes.

I zoned out after that, figuring I'd wait until one or both of them came into my room to seal whatever my fate was.

It took what felt like ages before Darry walked in, looking a lot less tense and angry. I looked up at him cautiously, but he just sat down beside me and scratched lightly at my scalp.

He did that for a few minutes before he spoke up. "I'm sorry for yelling at you, Pony."

"It's 'kay, I deserve it," I replied, letting my eyes flutter shut. "I'm really sorry, Dar. I keep doing dumb shit and it's just making things so much harder on you."

"Don't worry 'bout me, little brother," he said warmly, "I'll be fine. I want you to get some sleep tonight, and I'll see what I wanna do with you tomorrow, yea?"

"m'kay." I was half asleep at the time, so I hardly remember Darry sliding my jeans off of me and tucking me in. I remember getting a kiss on my forehead, and then I feel into a dark sleep.

**0_0**

**wooo this is really angsty, sorry ! you'll get more information on two bit and why pony did what he did in the next chap! enjoy!**


	15. Chapter 15

I woke up with a yell in the middle of the night to another nightmare. I was sweating and shivering some, but I wasn't crying this time.

Soda sat up almost as quick as I did, one of his hands going straight to my back and the other to wipe some sleep out of his eyes.

"Are you okay, honey?" He asked softly, and I heard Darry's footsteps coming quickly down the hallway.

Darry opened the door, sighing in relief when he seen that I was calm and slowly walkedover to the bed. "You okay?"

"He's shaking," Soda frowned, still rubbing my back.

"'m fine," I muttered, still leaning into Darry's hug. "It was just a dream."

"I wish they'd go away," Soda muttered.

"You?" I huffed, and he chuckled, and so did, Darry.

"You wanna go back to bed?" Darry asked gently, slowly leaning out of the hug.

I frowned, missing the comfort but nodded slightly. "Yeah, I guess. But can I sleep in your room, Dar? I wanna talk to you."

He gave me a weird look but nodded, standing up and yawning. "Yea, that's fine."

Soda was giving me the same look, but still nodded at me and kissed my forehead. "Goodnight, kid."

I followed Darry back to his room, flopping onto my stomach on his bed with a sigh. I felt myself dozing off until I felt Darry lay down beside me, the bed dipping.

"What did you wanna talk about?" He asked quietly.

I rolled over, smashing my face into the side of his shoulder. "'m sorry."

"I know, Pony, you've mentioned."

"I just keep making your life complicated and I don't mean to, and it's not fair that you're stuck with me, and I know that-"

Darry cut me off, elbowing me lightly. "Hey, stop that, okay? You are not making my life complicated. I am not stuck with you, you are my baby brother, and I love you, it has nothing to do with being 'stuck' with you, because that is not the case. Yes, you make me angry or disappointed at times, yes you do stupid things, but that does not mean you're making my life complicated. It means that you're 15 and I'm your guardian and more importantly, your brother, that's what it means. So no more blaming yourself for everything, understood?"

I sniffled a tad bit, wiping my wet eyes off on Darry's shoulder. "Understood."

I felt him nod and kiss the top of my head. "S'okay, try and get some sleep, buddy."

"I don't want another spanking," I blurted out, "I just..I don't, and I'm sorry, and I'm sore and I'm never going to do something stupid _ever_ again."

I heard Darry snort a soft laugh before kissing my head again. "For some reason, I doubt that. But I don't know if I'm going to spank you again, yet. I was gonna sleep on it."

"I'm sorry I tried to sneak out again, okay? It was dumb, and I didn't want to have to tell my friends that I couldn't do it because my big brother won't let me. None of their parents or anything care what they do, they wouldn't get it." I explained, getting quiet towards the end.

"Sometimes it may seem like havin' me and Soda around and them not having nobody makes them seem lucky, but I promise you it'll be better for you in the long run."

"I know, I do," I said quickly. "I don't know what I would do without you and Soda around, I'd go crazy having to be alone. But it does suck having to worry about consequences when they don't and can do what they want, y'know?"

"Yeah, I know, Ponyboy," He said.

"Does that mean you're not gonna spank me?" I asked hopefully, one eye peaking up at him.

Darry sighed, wrapping an arm around me and squeezing me tightly. "I probably will, Pony,"

I whined at that, "No, Dar! You don't gotta!"

"If I do, I won't strap you or nothin' like that, it won't be that bad, not as bad as any of the other times." He soothed quietly, rubbing my back.

"Please don't. I'm sorry. I've learned my lesson, Dar," I whispered, burying my head back into his shoulder.

"I know, baby. Just let me think on it, and I'll decide when I get home from work tomorrow, okay?"

"That's a long time from now," I groaned. "It's gonna be torture making me wait."

"Mmm, I bet." Darry replied, kissing my head again. "Just go back to bed, Pon'."

"G'night," I whispered, nodding into his side.

"Good night, baby boy."

**._.**

**short chapter to hold you over until i decide whether or not dar's gonna spank pony again. **

**idk if he should or not, because pony seems pretty repentent already..what do you think?**


	16. Chapter 16

After Darry went to work the next morning, I tried to push whatever decision he'd end up coming to the back of my mind. I had chores to do and I was not going to let myself worry all day, especially home alone.

I was only home alone until around 1 or so when Two-Bit made his way into our house, yelling his usual loud hello's and flopping down on our couch.

I never really heard much about what happened with Two-Bit and Darry when Darry had to go get him that night, just that Darry dropped him off and talked to him a bit. Two-Bit's drinking had slowed down considerably since that night, but I'd never really thought twice about it.

Me and him talked about some things, what's going on with the Soc's, who's dead who's not, and everything else that evened out to 'small talk' in our lives.

It was just Two-Bit and I until Darry and Soda got home - Steve was at home with his sick child - and Darry looked unusually..happy?

I damn sure wan't going to complain about that. Okay, he's in a good mood. That's probably good news for me, right?

Two-Bit noticed, too and he eyed Darry the same way I did, a curious look on his face. "What's got you so giddy?"

Darry only shrugged, but Sodapop answered for him, patting him on his shoulder. "Superman here got a promotion."

"Really?" I perked up. "Does that mean you make more money?"

He snorted some, but nodded. "Quite a bit more."

We all congratulated him, and I was really happy, because that meant his stress levels for paying bills could go down and lord knows he needed it. I was worrying about him more than he was worrying about us lately.

"Pony," Darry interrupted my thoughts, and I could see he was walking towards his bedroom. "C'mere for a second, we need to talk."

I looked up at Soda, who was busy stuffing his face with cake. He shrugged at me, cocking his head towards the bedroom, signing for me to follow him.

I knew I had to, I didn't have a choice. I had to face me fate eventually. Just hope it's good fate.

With a loud sigh that clearly said 'I really don't want to but I'm going to because my brother will swat me until I do so I might as well make this easier on everybody involved', I got up from the couch and followed Darry into the room.

I shut the door behind me, shuffling forward until I was standing in front of him. I put my hands behind my back and looked down at my feet.

Before I had actual time to process what was happening, he had me by the elbow and had turned me around. He swatted me once - very, very hard, may I add - and then turned me back around. My hands immediately flew back to my behind to protect myself and to rub away the sting. I let out a soft whine, glaring at him."Ow! What was that for?"

"Yesterday." He said firmly, letting the one word do the explaining.

"So you are gonna spank me?" I muttered quietly, looking back down.

"No," He replied just as firm. "I'm not. That's why I just did that. I'm gonna let you off on this one. I think the lesson has been learned on this particular subject, correct?"

I nodded quickly, hugging him as quick and tightly as I could. "Learned completely."

"But," Darry said lightly pushing on my shoulders so I'd back up from the hug. "You're grounded until I say otherwise since you can't seem to stay grounded."

I kind of groaned at that, but didn't protest. "Okay..but may I ask how long that may be?"

"Until I say otherwise, Ponyboy," he repeated, raising an eyebrow which was pretty much asking me to challenge him on this."

I didn't dare. I nodded quickly. "Yes, sirree. And thanks, Dar."

"Don't thank me for not punishing you, Pony. It makes me feel bad." Darry laughed lightly.

"Mmkay, whatever." I replied, hugging him quickly once more before leaving the room. I heard him laugh a little before following me.

Soda smiled at me when he seen me come back out, knowing that things didn't end with me having a sore ass. I flopped back down on the couch, sitting on Two-Bit's legs. He didn't seem to mind, intent on the television until Darry tapped his head from behind the couch. "You had anything to drink?"

"God, no, I wish," Two-Bit muttered, rubbing his eyes. "Can I at least have a beer?"

Darry rolled his eyes but walked to our fridge to retrieve one for him. "Why aren't you drinking?"

"Your big brother's got me on a dry spell." He replied, rolling his eyes, too.

"Don't rob gas stations while your drunk and I'll let you drink, again." Darry explained, handing Two-Bit the beer.

"Oh, it was one time." He groaned, taking off the cap and sitting up, pushing me off of his legs.

"One time is all it takes," Darry replied, walking back towards the kitchen. "We ain't losing you the same we lost Dallas. I'm not letting that happen."

It got incredibly sad at that moment. And quiet. Darry most definitely made a point with that one. Two-Bit looked at his beer nearly disgusted, setting it down on the table. He shook his head like he was saying 'no' before I seen tears pool in his eyes. He blinked quickly a few times, but then took off to the bathroom.

He didn't want us to see him cry.

**-0**

**short chapter, a bit of a filler of what happened with two bit and what's gonna happen with Ponyboy. sad ending, and the next chapter will probably be completely sad. gonna make the boys talk about their feelings and all that. 0-0**


End file.
